Schools are out so what now? A week into summer break your ADHD child is already declaring they are bored! With summer comes a lot of fun, but also lots of freedom and lack of structure. This can be a mixed bag for those with ADHD and their loved ones. ADHD children crave structure – correction- they NEED structure. Without a set routine and a structured life their ADHD symptoms tend to increase.
Being a single mom with ADHD and having a son with ADHD is a challenge in and of itself. I have to keep us both on routine and plan ahead. What plan ahead? Kind of an oxymoron for someone with ADHD right? Planning ahead is not optional, it is a strategy that will lead to success! I am not good at planning and executing activities on a daily basis. It may not seem that difficult to do for some people but for me it just doesn't come natural. With that in mind I arm myself with an arsenal of local newspapers, magazines and scour the internet for local happenings which may interest my family. I also use a wall calendar and enter the activities we will do so everyone knows what to expect and what the plan for the week is.
Since relaxing doesn't come natural for most of us with ADHD either. I have always been told to 'just relax and have fun' and that tends to make me even more stressed. How can I lie around and do nothing when so much needs to be done and my mind won't stop thinking even for a second? My son is in constant motion and will create a whirlwind of mess and chaos around him if I let him. So with that in mind summer is also a great time to start or revise (if you have not already) a list of chores and expectations that they must do every day. Teaching them to be responsible for their mess will also decrease the mess they will make and give you more time to relax. Using wall charts is a good way to give them direction in their own daily chores.
Here are some suggestions to make life this summer a little easier and more fun:
• Plan a few fun things to do over the summer and spread them out on your visible wall calendar. I say visible because your children need to see it too so they know what to expect and what is expected of them. Write these down on a big calendar so the kids can see them and anticipate these fun activities during their unstructured time. Plan a few play dates and small 'mini-vacation' activities that your family enjoys. Go explore some new local spots right in your own town and create an adventure of your own.
• Keep your basic family rules and routines in place. It is ok to be flexible during the summer or to have special summer rules and routines but try not to vary them too much from your regular routine. Kids need consistency and structure even in the summer. This is especially true for those with ADHD. Just because they are on vacation from school doesn't mean they don't still have responsibilities around the house. Kids also need adequate sleep so they won't be irritable.
• ADHD kids are very creative and they also need plenty of unstructured play time to explore. Allow time for them to 'do nothing' or to entertain themselves. Let them know that it's OK to be bored sometimes and then let them solve the problem for themselves. But also take the oppurtinuity to be creative and provide them with art supplies, reading books, puzzles … relaxing things they may enjoy.
• Allow for plenty of time for your ADHD kids to share their thoughts and feelings with you as well as just 'hang out' with you every day. If they know they will have special time with you they will be less inclined to tell you every thought as it comes to them or to try and compete with their siblings to receive your attention.
• Get plenty of exercise and time outdoors. Kids with ADHD need plenty of time to run around and play and release their endorphins. The brain chemicals that are released during intense exercise will soothe their mind and their body which allows them to relax and have more fun. Nature has a calming effect as well so let the little ones play outside often. Plan trips to the park, bike riding, nature walks and when all else fails check out the local park district or YMCA for classes and even summer camps.
• As for you adults - take some time out for yourself too. Plan some time alone for yourself to recharge your battery and enjoy the activities that you love to do. It seems as if the summer tends to revolve around the kids but in order for the kids to enjoy themselves they need parents who are calm. Explore your inner child and rediscover the fun of summer!
